Linkback Issues With Free Escort Advertising Malls/Sites
August 26, 2009 | Leave a Comment
This is just one part of a very long discussion. I’m discussing actual ads, not merely a banner exchange.
Due to my travels, I’ve looked into getting free advertising as much as possible. It’s very expensive to constantly pay for ads in changing locations, not to mention all the payment headaches. The number of online advertisers has exploded (especially overseas), so there are many options – even when I try to narrow my choices to what I think will be the best for me.
Because these are free ads, advertisers also want me to link back to them and the home page has become the popular spot. Advertisers have become overly aware of SEO and want huge text links with every keyword they can think of. It junks up my site, making it look somewhat spammy to Google too — which could decrease my site’s PageRank. (Advertising on an online mall is not about SEO for the escort, it’s simply about getting seen by clients.) I understand that advertisers need to be competitive by working on their PageRank and such.
But I think it’s gone to extremes. Even very minor sites think they should get 20 keyword-heavy text links leading from the front page of my site. If I’m not getting a front page spot on their site with lots of text/pictures, how is this a fair trade? If I’m lucky, I get a photo somewhere on their site. Or maybe just a text link, buried in their pages. That’s not worth junking up my homepage for.
Paid ads sometimes requires this as well, but it’s not as bad as with free ads. No one says you must use free ads (or any ads at all), but sometimes an escort has little advertising choice due to her location or budget. A number of escorts don’t even use advertisers and have a successful business (discussion of various non-advertising-mall methods throughout Book 2: Advertising and Marketing).
My Escort Site’s Advertising Policy
My advertiser policy: If you want your link here, you must have a very well-established, high-traffic site. Your link must be a badge. If you want your link here and you’re not a major site, then my ad should be on your index page just as your badge is here. Otherwise, all advertiser links go where they belong: on my Directories and Boards page.
All escorts are welcome to start using this policy (reword as needed).
Who knows how well this policy will work? I don’t think it’s any more arbitrary than the policies advertisers often have for their free ads.
Badges can still have keywords in their alt and title tags if the advertisers want. And images won’t mess up the design of your site like their heavily-coded banners often do (another new, irritating trend with advertisers). On a personal note, I think badges just look more attractive.
The Goals of Advertising Malls
Advertisers seem to forget that SEO and attracting new advertisers are two different things. To broadly summarize the cycle of attracting new advertisers — girls always use other escort sites as research tools looking for good places to advertise, photograher references and so on. Escorts will go to sites that seem good or are used by other escorts they like. More escorts advertising will draw clients. If the site charges for advertising, it will draw more revenue with more escorts. And if the escorts are successful with the site, the site grows even more. (Advertisers should realize a good banner will likely draw more escort-attention than lots of text like “London escorts”.)
Escorts also use sites that come up in Google searches for particular terms. The escorts are trying to mimic what potential clients will search for. This is where the SEO efforts of advertisers pay off. But there is more to SEO than forcing every advertiser to have frontpage links using the same keywords. I’ve seen sites pop up in the top 5 of my Google searches that I don’t want to advertise on because they seemed scammy or didn’t seem to have any real advertisers on there. I much prefer a site that’s established and has lots of real, established escorts advertising there. High PageRank isn’t the be-all, end-all of advertising malls. They have to benefit clients and escorts fairly equally to be truly successful (or at least appear to benefit both parties).
Their Traffic to YOU
Of course, your most important consideration is the Web traffic and successful appointments an advertiser brings you. Even the nicest site is worthless if it brings 1 hit/month. Checking Web stats or simply asking where a client found you tells you all you need to know. And when it’s not those sites lounging on your front page, well, there’s not much reason to keep them around.
Which makes one of the most successful, (formerly free) advertising options of all – CraigsList – even a better deal for those girls who use it.
Writing an Escort Ad
August 6, 2009 | Leave a Comment
This is a very quick “what not to do” post.
One escort I saw online described herself as a “top chef” escort. From the context of her sentence, she wasn’t referring to her culinary abilities; instead she was comparing herself to a slightly more expensive margarita: top shelf.
I imagine her mistake came about because she drank a lot of margaritas and never clearly understood what the bartender was saying when she ordered one.
Some simple guidelines to avoid this:
- Proofread. If you never paid attention in school, find a friend who did and get them to proofread for you.
- Don’t compare yourself to food, cars, clothes, shoes, diamonds or any other inanimate object. I’d also refrain from comparing yourself to the elements. Animals and plants are iffy — they’re living creatures and many humans have similar qualities. That doesn’t always mean it needs to be in your ad, though.
- Drop the superlatives. Writing a straightforward ad about who you are as an escort is really the easiest way to go. It’s hard to mess it up (if you proofread).
The Hard Sell
There is a lot more discussion on writing your ads (and website content) in Book 2: Advertising and Marketing 
Field Testing: Having Sex on Your Period
July 19, 2009 | Leave a Comment
Warning: if you’re put off by very frank discussion of the female body and its functions, you should probably stop reading right now. I’m going to talk about menstrual cycles in a non-titillating manner.
In Book 1 I outline several methods of dealing with your period while working. I hadn’t tried them all when I wrote that section. Since then, I have. I’ve been off birth control pills for the past year and my periods have resumed their normal, very-heavy tendencies. Besides not working on my heavy days, I’ve tried some different methods. I have to. As always, being on my period guarantees lots of appointment-requests. I still haven’t figured out why that happens.
Obviously this post is for those who aren’t taking birth control that completely stops menstruation.
Instead Cups
I still love my Instead Cups. The offer the best options. For light days, they’re perfect on their own. On heavy days I still put something absorbent inside the cup before inserting them. A low-to-medium absorbency tampon can work, or a small, natural sea sponge. It’s very important to remember you’re using backup and make sure you remove it when you remove the cup. Leaving it inside will cause an infection.
If you’re having sex with someone well-endowed, they could cause the cup to leak, with or without the absorbent materials inside. Not much you can do about that. Know your body, know your clients and try to work around your period if you and/or your clients really don’t want leakage. I discuss using the cups a bit more in Book 1.
Natural Sea Sponges
The have been used as tampons for a very long time. You can buy pre-sized ones online. Or you can try to find reasonably-sized and priced sponges in a store, usually a “healthy” or “green” store or the makeup section of a many other stores. Depending on where you live, it might just be easier to purchase them online.
These are very good instructions for cleaning your sponge. After washing my hands, I rinsed the sea sponge with very warm water, cleaned with dish soap, rinsed and rinsed, soaked it overnight in pure white vinegar, rinsed some more and then microwaved it on a clean plate for 3-4 minutes. It needed to be almost bone-dry but not burning!
Advice from experience: do not microwave dry sponges. They will burn up, turn black and stink very badly. I killed my favorite sponge this way.
If you aren’t going to use your sea sponge right away, put in in a clean sealed container. A plastic baggie or glass jar works. When you’re ready to use it, wash your hands, rinse the sponge thoroughly and microwave on a clean plate again. That first cleaning to make sure you’re killing any leftover bacteria from the sea. This cleaning might seem obsessive to you, but I don’t think anything you put inside your body can be too clean.
Even if you plan on using it with an Instead Cup, it’s a good idea to sew a thread or piece of plastic dental tape (a type of floss) through the middle of it while it’s still dry. Make sure your needle is sterilized with alcohol and just make a simple loop. It’s good if it’s a big loop. Knot the end well and cut any excess. Now you have something your fingers can grab if it goes a bit beyond your reach.
To use, first rinse it under warm/body temperature tap water until it swells and is completely soft again. Squeeze out the excess water. It should still be soft and fluffy. Fold it up so it resembles a tampon, maybe put some KY Jelly on the end to make it easier, and gently push it in. It’s like putting in a tampon with your fingers, but I find sea sponges to be much softer and gentler.
The sea sponge is rather absorbent, but if you have sex with just a sea sponge, expect it to get shoved quite far back in your vaginal canal. This makes retrieving it hard to do by yourself because your hand will be bent at a bad angle. If you can find your loop of string and get it wrapped around your finger, you can push down on it and pull out. More effort than a tampon requires but the same concept. Or do what a friend of mine does — “squat and grunt.” It really does work.
I find that sea sponges can get very slippery with blood and are often hard to grasp with your fingers canted at that angle. A trusted friend/partner who doesn’t mind fishing it out for you can make life easier.
Once removed, cut your thread out and throw the thread away because it will harbor bacteria. Rinse the sponge well under cold, cold water until it’s clean. Vinegar-soak, then microwave again, putting it back in its container until next time. If you need to reuse immediately, I highly recommend going through the whole microwave/threading process again. Cold water alone will not kill any germs, nor do you want to give yourself Toxic Shock Syndrome.
Soft Tampons
I’ve been wanting to try these for years. Europe has a couple of brands. I’m not sure why the US doesn’t carry any. Soft tampons are basically an artificial sponge, a lot like the contraceptive sponge from several years ago. Some of these sponges have a built-in loop to grab, others have a built-in finger-hole.
They’re simliar to sea sponges, minus all the maintenance. I recently bought and used my first soft tampons and love them.
The Beppy Wet tampon comes pre-moistened with sterile saline solution (the liquid that contact lens wearers store their lenses in). If you buy dry sponges you have to get them wet with water. I think it’s easier to just buy the wet ones. They’re a little rough and not as soft as a sea sponge but they still glide in easier than a tampon. They’re quite large – you fold them up, add a dab of KY Jelly to the end and push in. Done.
Because of their slightly rough surface, they’re easier for your fingers to grab when you’re ready to remove. The finger-hole helps a lot too. They don’t become as slippery as sea sponges either. Because of their size and springiness, it’s hard for them to get stuck so far in you that you can’t feel them and wiggle them down with your fingers. The only downside to their texture is that squatting and grunting doesn’t work very well because they’re not as slippery as sea sponges – they grip your vaginal walls better.
They don’t absorb blood so much as block your cervix and prevent blood from coming out. Flat, round, latex makeup sponges have the same effect. So when you remove a soft tampon, expect some amount of mess. Not as much as an Instead Cup, but more than an absorbent sea sponge.
Toss in the garbage and do whatever else you need to do.
FYI, they aren’t “green.”
Decisions
It’s your body and you know how it works best. I can’t make any choices for you, nor do I want to. Please experiment safely. During your period your cervix is open and bacteria can easily enter your uterus (which is a sterile environment), potentially causing a life-threatening infection. Don’t be casual about what you do to your body.
If you discover a new method that works well, tell me! Post it on your blog and I’ll add a link here. Women always want to know how to have sex on their periods, not just escorts.
Know Your Rights!
January 17, 2009 | Leave a Comment
A new administration, continuing crackdowns on CraigsList and sex workers watching their incomes fall leave many vulnerable who haven’t worried before.
Just in time, SWOP-Chicago has released two videos for all sex workers who face the possibility of arrest on prostitution charges. It’s an excellent resource for all. I highly encourage anyone reading this blog to view the videos and learn.
Know Your Rights Part I covers arrest — what to do and what not to do. Basically, you stand a much better chance of events turning in your favor if you stay silent.
Know Your Rights Part II covers what happens after an arrest and spends significant time on walking you through your Emergency Response Worksheet step-by-step.
These videos are valuable resources compiled not only by the actual collective experience of SWOP-Chicago, but anchored by their legal consultations as well. No rumors or urban legend allowed. Straight up, practical lessons on handling the event in the best possible way. Repeat viewings are encouraged.
CNBC Looks at High-End Escorts
November 11, 2008 | Leave a Comment
For those who are curious to hear about high-end escort work from escorts in their own words, you can tune in tonight at 10pm to watch The Business of High-End Prostitution.
Yours truly is there as well. The entire show should be of interest.
Choosing a Domain Name — Extra Tip
May 19, 2008 | Leave a Comment
In the section in Book 2 on purchasing domain names, I come up with some creative reasons for not buying your working name for your escort Web site.
Another reason I should’ve mentioned: someone else might not like it.
If you pick the name (or create a similar name) of a celebrity or fictional character, you could get a cease-and-desist letter from their estate or attorney. You run the risk of a defamation or copyright/trademark violation lawsuit as well.
Or you could inadvertently choose the name of a real person, who discovers that an escort is using their name online. If they’re the wrong kind of person, they may well sue you for defamation.
While I haven’t seen this happen yet, an escort I know shares the name of an author (who has made remarks on her blog). Though the escort has been using her working name for a few years, the author was born with that name and could make things ugly if she really wanted.
This is simply something to be aware of when choosing a domain name. Some escorts get around this by purchasing domains like DateAmanda.com or AmandaofDallas.com instead of buying AmandaBrooks.com. Still not very creative, in my opinion, but less likely to make someone else upset.
When You DON’T Need a Site Disclaimer
May 16, 2008 | Leave a Comment
Though I’ve discussed Web site disclaimers both here and in Book 2, the truth is your site may not require a disclaimer.
If the site is simple and doesn’t allude to sexual activity (paid or unpaid), and your photos are unrevealing; an age limit and/or 2257 statement could be completely unnecessary. You might still want a Disclaimer page to make a copyright statement or to provide visitors the chance to leave if they’ve truly found your site by accident. But if you don’t have this extra page at the front of your site you should not be breaking any current stated Internet laws (I’m not a lawyer and this is not substitute for legal counsel).
I have a Disclaimer on this site (though not the blog since it’s within the site’s structure) because I feel it’s proper. Though I doubt anyone has reached this site looking for information on anything other than safer sex or Internet escorts, I want to cover my bases. The topic is volatile enough.
But a well-made escort site with nothing more than PG-rated content may not have to worry about making a disclaimer at all.
Escort Photo Options
May 1, 2008 | Leave a Comment
If my previous post on model releases concerned you, there are ways around it. This post is only about options for still photographs, not video.
Lying
Of course, the method many escorts will use is to just lie about their real name on the release. That’s not very smart from a legal standpoint – if you have an issue with the photographer and you lied on the model release, you probably won’t win your case. And if they have to verify your age with ID, then you can’t lie unless you have a fake ID (not something I recommend).
Even lying won’t save you if you wish to be discreet about your face, or want control over the photos to remove identifying details, like tattoos. There are other options.
Work for Hire
Different photographers may call it different things, but the basic concept is that you simply hire the photographer for a set amount of time. Not all photographers publicly offer this option, but if they’re good businesspeople, they know what their hourly rate is and can quickly give you a quote.
The purpose of buying a photographer’s time is because you need photos, but don’t want those photos appearing in their portfolio. Whatever they create for you is copyrighted to you, not them (as is normal with most model releases). And you shouldn’t have to sign a model release at all since the photos are yours and completely under your control.
This is usually a more expensive method than hiring a photographer for one of their stated packages. But if you need extreme discretion, this is an option.
Explanations of the “work for hire” concept:
legally defining “work for hire”
how “work for hire” applies in the arts
more on using “work for hire”
Memory Cards
A cheap and easy way of ensuring control of your photos is to buy a memory card for the camera the photographer will use and using only that memory card. This would work great with a “work for hire” contract. It probably won’t work with a standard model release/photo package.
It’s also a great option if you have a friend take pictures for you because you don’t have your own camera. The photos are under your complete control at all times. No question.
Friends
Though most friends won’t ask, techincally, they own the photo they’ve created unless you sign a “work for hire” contract with them. Just so you know.
Film
I’m going to sound old-fashioned, but one great way of owning your photos is to have them taken on film. There’s no way the images can be surreptitiously downloaded from the camera. While less and less photographers use film, you can find skilled amateurs and some professionals willing to use film.
It’s also a fairly inexpensive set-up if you want to take your own photos. Film cameras are dropping in price. Or it works if you have a neighbor/friend who’ll let you borrow their film camera for self-portraits. They’ll never have any idea what you used the camera for.
The caveat: you must have a professional photo lab nearby. They’ll process images with nudity and not ask questions, plus they can professionally scan the images and give you a CD. Professional film scanning costs a few dollars per image, so only scan the ones you really like. The photos CDs you get from processing in a drug store aren’t high-quality scans and won’t translate to the Web very well.
There are professional photo labs who accept mail-in rolls of film for processing, but obviously that’s a time-consuming option.
Self-Portraits
Taking your own photos automatically means you own all rights and the images are under your control from the start. The problem is that it can be difficult to take good self-portraits. Whether you use film or digital, you’ll need a tripod and a cable release (with digital cameras, you may need a “slave” or “remote”). Expect a learning curve.
I offer tips on self-portraits in Book #2, so I won’t go into that here. The important thing to remember is that you can take as many photos as you want. No one but you has to see them. This allows you to be silly, creative and make mistakes.
Purchasing a high-quality camera is imperative. Though 35mm film cameras do okay with professional scanning, you may want to invest in a 120 film camera (also known as 220 or medium-format). If using a digital camera, 6 megapixel is the lowest you should go. Less megapixels means less detail and clarity, giving your pictures a less-professional look.
You may also want to invest in Photoshop to do your own effects. It’s fun and easy to learn color balancing, play with contrast, lightly retouch or create arty effects with your photos.
Discretion
Not everyone needs to go through contortions to get their photos. Those with serious privacy concerns don’t want to waste time finding a trustworthy photographer; so some alternative options are needed.
The Model Release
April 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment
As some of you may not be aware, Kristen (Spitzer’s escort) was in some Girls Gone Wild videos. Regardless of what you think of those videos, the owner has her signed model release and can happily sell her tapes without her permission and pocket the profits (I believe he’s chosen to simply distribute the tapes for free — either way, he can do what he wants with the footage).
Most of us haven’t been in a GGW video (I hope). Still, the issue of a model release can be a thorny one. I go into more detail in Book 2 in the section where I discuss finding a professional photographer.
What is a model release?
A model release is usually a one-page document that states what rights the photographer retains over the images and what rights the model has. The model is required to sign their legal name and date. The model release is signed before the photo shoot begins. In the case of adult-oriented photos, the model will be required to state their date of birth and usually a copy of their ID is made to go with the model release.
A model release doesn’t require a law degree to understand. Simply reading the document before signing is usually all that’s needed to understand what you’re signing.
Make a copy of the release your own records.
Why sign it?
For legal reasons, photographers need the protection of a model release, especially when shooting photos with nudity. They need proof you’re over 18. And the model release protects them from lawsuits if they use the pictures in the way the release states — even if you don’t like it.
For you, the protection comes in the form of what rights the photographer does and doesn’t have with your image. If the photographer is using your pictures in a way not clearly stated on the release, you could legally compel them to stop.
The Catch
Most model releases, at least with print/digital still photos, is boilerplate. It usually gives the model the right to use the photos for their own self-promotion but not to sell. It almost always gives the photographer the right to use the photos in their own portfolio, to sell or to use in any other way they need to promote their business (e.g., advertisements, Web site).
If you don’t like any of the things contained in the model release, you need to change the contract right there and make sure the photographer signs. Discussing this well before the shoot will keep both of you from wasting time if you can’t come to an agreement.
But you must change the model release if you don’t like the terms. You can’t just make a verbal complaint and expect the photographer to follow your wishes.
Why does this matter?
It obviously matters if you get caught up in some scandal and an opportunistic photographer is free to use or sell your images however he wants. That’s not a worry most people have, of course.
A more realistic worry is the photographer displaying you in his portfolio. If you’re an escort who does not show your face or had heavy retouching, you’re not going to want your very-identifiable shots in his online portfolio — showing your identity to the world or revealing how much retouching you had done (this isn’t a discussion about the ethics of retouching, so I’m not going to get into that). Maybe you don’t mind if he has prints in his actual studio portfolio, but you object to showing the photos online. Time to change the model release.
Maybe you don’t wish for him to display your pictures at all, in any way. Time for a big discussion, a whole new model release, and perhaps extra payment since he can’t use his efforts in advertising his services.
A professional photographer won’t take a single picture until the model release is signed. It is a document you sign and it could impact your life. If you have questions or concerns, don’t sign.
Other Options
If this little discussion on model releases makes you uncomfortable, I have a few ideas on working around it.
My First-Ever Appointment Part 2 of 2
March 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment
Arriving
My afternoon arrival in DC was off to a bad start. My credit card expired on that day and the rental car company wouldn’t take a cash deposit. Being from Texas and not used to traveling, I was wary of the cost of taxis, but had no choice. I ran into the same problems when checking into the hotel, but they accepted cash.
I was unable to get a hold of my friend and had no idea if she was in DC as promised. I wasn’t getting any calls from my Eros ad (I only had a phone number posted, no e-mail was set up) and could not visually confirm if my ad was up since I didn’t have a laptop. I was in panic mode.
My friend came through. She was down the hall and around the corner from my room. She was simply very busy. She took a break and welcomed me while she ate dinner. We had no way of checking Eros but she went over screening and phone etiquette with me again. It helped calm me down.
My phone rang and it was a DC area code! I was so excited and nervous. I briefly talked to this man and he said he’d call later. I didn’t care; I’d made it through my first call and knew my ad was up. Now, of course, I worried it would be the only call I’d get all night. I had used up what I’d made at the club this week on the trip and was going to miss the weekend shifts. It was the end of the month too. This trip had put me into a serious financial bind. (Better planning might have alleviated the problem.)
Then I had another call. This guy sounded nice and he gave me his screening info. I took notes and then screened him via the phone as my friend listened in and gave some final pointers. He seemed good, so I called him back and we set up an appointment for that evening! It was an hour-long appointment (my minimum), which was mentally more than I could handle right then.
I was so nervous. She had more appointments, so I went back to my room and got things ready. I didn’t watch TV. I mostly paced. What was I going to do? What was going to happen? God lord, what if he took one look and walked back out the door? What are escorts supposed to look like? What are they supposed to do? My thoughts raced around and around.
The Appointment
He knocked on the door right on time. I was wearing some lingerie beneath a sheer robe that I wore in the club sometimes. Despite repeated dry-cleanings, it reeked of cigarettes. (That really didn’t create a great ambience.) It wasn’t until later that I realized being fully-dressed is much better.
He was a very tall, well-built man, possibly from the Middle-East (I know I asked, but I don’t recall his answer. I do remember his face.). He was so polite and very charming. He showed me two IDs when I asked. When I asked for my “gift” he laid the appropriate amount on the nightstand (a classic move). He sat in a chair and I sat on the bed. We chatted.
Asking for two forms of ID is fairly standard practice. I had read and re-read Working by Dolores French. She screened very thoroughly and her methods of screening are still useful today, only it’s much easier to do online. You can find a link to Working on my Sex Work Books list.
This was so much easier than the club! He was sober, the music on the radio was quiet so I didn’t have to shout and he wasn’t distracted by other women walking around. He seemed really happy to meet me and I enjoyed talking to him.
At what seemed like the right time, I rose from the bed as seductively as possible and untied my robe. I smiled and asked if he’d like to “get comfortable.” He got up from the chair and hugged me. I kissed him on the lips (he was really tall, so I was straining). He smelled nice, much better than my smoky robe.
He started to undress. I was already in my underwear but I kicked off my heels. We hugged again and lay down together on the bed, wrapped in each other’s arms and lightly kissing.
This wasn’t bad at all. It felt natural and very pleasant. I was still nervous about all sorts of things but he was very nice and that was reassuring. He was treating me far better than anyone I’d met in a club (not that I went this far with customers in the club). There was a definite sense that he was following my lead, which also helped reassure me.
This might have been moving a little fast for me — even in college — but it wasn’t anything I wasn’t willing to do. There was a sense of play I might have enjoyed if I weren’t so wound up. We were two people enjoying each other. Nothing unnatural about that.
We’d been slowly removing our underwear. Now he was completely naked, so I took one of my condoms and moved down on him. I could see him clearly in the light and his skin looked clean and unbroken. I sat on his thighs and fumbled with the condom wrapper. It was obvious I was not used to handling condom packages. That lack of experience made him smile. (I had just ended a long-term relationship, so not only was I not used to condoms, I wasn’t having much sex either.)
I finally got the condom on him for the blowjob (yes, I practice safer sex). It was unlubed and tasted horrible, like a balloon. It made me want to gag. I stopped with the blowjob and put a little lube on my palm to rub on the condom. I got on top (my least favorite position) and we began having sex.
It was actually exciting. I was so nervous I thought I wouldn’t enjoy anything, but my natural responses kicked in and we had fun. I think he had more fun than I did, but my declining relationship had been a lot worse. We rolled around until he had an orgasm. I cleaned him with a warm, wet towel and put the condom in the trash. I snuggled against him for some pillow talk.
He made all sorts of wonderful promises: calling every day I was in town, taking me on a trip to Miami, yachting…it all sounded grand. I was excited to think I’d charmed my first client that much. (It turns out some men simply get caught up in the moment.) He dressed. I kissed him before I opened the door.
Afterglow
He had a better clock in his head than I did. It was exactly an hour. It didn’t feel like it. At the beginning, I thought an hour was way too much time. Now that he was gone, an hour wasn’t long enough to really have fun!
I was grinning. I showered quickly and went over to see my friend. She was done for the night. I couldn’t stop raving about my first appointment. I was thrilled. It paid for my hotel stay with plenty left over. All in one stroke! There were lots of nights I didn’t make this much in a 7-hour shift at the club (one of the signs I had stripper burnout). I couldn’t believe how easy and natural it was for me, given that it paid so well. What was wrong with the world? This was the best-kept secret ever!
She and I laughed, ate snacks and watched a little TV. She was amused by my excitement. I couldn’t wait for the next day.
The Rest of the Trip
My phone rang off the hook. I couldn’t keep up with the volume. It seems the universe understood that I wanted more business and it complied. I had an even mix of one and two –hour appointments over the next two days. I scheduled as many appointments as I could rationally fit into the day. I was there to make money. I wasn’t concerned about building a business in DC, I wanted experience and to start feeling confident. I wanted notches on my belt (like college, but better).
There were a couple of missteps but nothing terribly serious (yes, I got ripped off – that’s another story with several other lessons). She went home the day before I did (she’d been there all week). I flew home by myself, glowing the whole way. The money I made not only paid for the trip and all associated expenses, it paid for the upcoming month’s bills too. One weekend of work and I didn’t have to do anything else right away if I didn’t want to.
I knew I was on the right path for me. This was the answer I’d been looking for. I couldn’t wait to put my ad up in Dallas and start my business for real.
The Transition
The transition had already happened. The formality was easy: the night after I got home, I cleaned out my locker at the club. Why waste my time dealing with drunk assholes? I could have fun with a variety of interesting men who were willing to pay me well for my time and attention. Instead of constant, crushing rejection, I got treated like a princess. There was no choice to be made, no agonizing decision.
The only difficult part of the transition was telling my mother. Since I showed my face in my ad and I was going to be working in Dallas, I knew I needed to tell her before someone else did. This is a whole other lesson in and of itself, though. Suffice to say, I told her before my Dallas ad went up, right after that weekend. It was hard. But I’m still her daughter.
Lessons Learned
I should’ve planned better and made sure I had enough to cover expenses — for the trial-run and regular living expenses. Putting myself in a desperate situation could’ve been real trouble if I hadn’t been successful or couldn’t handle the work.
Don’t do things last minute. Planning ahead for something new helps keep problems to a minimum. Expect surprises, though.
Screen.
Wear actual clothing. Keep the room on the cool side.
These first few times were for learning. It took time for me to figure out what did and did not work for me. Experience gave me my “style,” though I was learning up to the day I retired.
I put my hotel information on my cell phone voicemail because I was afraid of missing calls. Stupid move. There could’ve been worse consequences than simply having to take the phone off the hook due to constant ringing.
It’s good to have a friend. Especially if she’s nearby. We toured together a couple more times until she moved out of the area.
Screen.
She and I are two different people. We each run our business in the way that suits us best.
Don’t believe promises men make, but enjoy them anyway. Wild promises are a compliment.
If I wasn’t sure about escort work, I could’ve asked for no reviews and not shown my face in my photos. I don’t regret that I didn’t do that, but I might if I had decided escort work was not for me.
Screen.
Escort work is not difficult for an intelligent girl who is a good conversationalist. One-hour minimums are a good place to start, the time will fly by. Soon, a single hour will feel constraining.
Being comfortable with entertaining men (from stripping), made transitioning to escort work very easy – but then, escort work was right for me and stripping wasn’t.
